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Was I born as a result of rape

Born of rape

You may have thought, “Why don't I know my father? Who is he?” You may have asked your mother this question in the past, and have never received an answer. You assume that this is a difficult question for her. She never talks about it, and maybe you think something happened between them.

You can read a lot about sexual violence on social media nowadays. Sometimes a woman gets pregnant when forced to have sex with a man. Maybe that's what happened to your mother, and maybe you were born as a result.

On this website you can read about how to talk to your mother about this and what could help you feel better in the end.

A teenager born as a result of sexual assault talks about her experiences. To protect the privacy of the teenager, she was played by an actress.
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"Children at school would always ask me where my father was. My mother never replied when I asked her about my father. I went to look in her papers and found out I was born of rape. My mother told her psychologist that she doesn't want to think about my father because she's afraid of him. I said I was sorry I was the reason she was reminded of those horrible things. I am glad we talked about this though."

Boy, 13 years old

Anxiety

Broaching the subject

If you have important questions about your origins, and you want to talk about it, it may be a good idea to start by writing a letter about what you want to say or ask. The letter can help you keep an overview of your questions while talking to each other. You could ask someone to read it before you give the letter to your mother. The important thing is that you and your mother both trust this person.

If you feel ready to broach the subject, choose a moment when your mother really has the time to talk. Tell her about your thoughts. And how it feels not knowing your father. Take out your letter and read it or let your mother read it herself. Maybe it helps to ask the person who helped you write the letter to join you during this conversation. They may be able to help if you don't know what to say.

In the documentary ‘Letter from my child’, Shakya writes a letter to his mother. Shayka was also born as a result of rape. View this documentary via the following link: https://www.npostart.nl/brief-van-mijn-kind/21-08- 2011/POW_00381146
Video: Beugel, I. (Director). (2011). Letter from my child. IKON.